Tuesday, August 12

we solute you

A grateful shout out to the Fast Company blog for pointing out a crack in our beaker. We've changed the motto to "pouring solvent on your 'solution,'" dropping the "confused," previously un-remarked-upon (and possibly previously un-viewed) "dropping the solvent in your 'solution.'" Salutations.

In our customary frenzy of blogging and linking, we couldn't help but notice that Heath Row, Fast Company's in-house Social Capitalist and blog critic, put on the rose-tinted raver shades to read yesterday's NYT piece on Fast Company by David Carr.

Carr's view:
"...Fast Company is clearly an enterprise that is staring down its own obsolescence. Since being bought in 2000 for an astounding $360 million by Gruner & Jahr USA, the American publishing division owned by Bertelsmann, Fast Company has swerved into the ditch....The number of advertising pages it carried last year were a little more than a third of the 2000 total. Newsstand sales — a good indicator of salience in the marketplace of ideas — are half of what they were in 2000. The jargon that drove the magazine — 'the brand of you' and 'social capitalist,' — seems as quaint and beside the point as the Pets.com sock puppet."

Row's evaluation of the article, posted on FC's weblog, Fast Company Now:
"the future painted by the piece looks bright."

Hm. The only notable reference to the future in Carr's piece (which makes a passing reference to "the ashes of the unfortunately named eCompany Now,") is a quote from John A. Byrne, FC's new editor, who says: "There is nothing but upside here."

Wednesday, August 6

Eyes Only: Fire-Grilled salads!

Truly amazing stuff. A friend of the language (name withheld until we hear different) forwarded something intended solely for those with drops of Kool-Aid hanging from their chins. This intercepted communique was meant to remain snugly between Bain and the BK Lounge. But like a greasy patty, it slipped out and onto the buzz-sawing room floor. On the Internet, there is no five-second rule.

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From: "jed morninducat"
Date: Tue, 5 Aug 2003 09:19:57 -0500
To: teeth@buzzkiller.net
Subject: We have a winner

Bain and Company accidentally e-mailed me a PPT presentation prepared for Burger King. The first slide was a classic. Titled "Salad Strategic Objective Statement," it read:

“Burger King will leverage its Fire-Grilled core asset and cooking advantage to be a potent competitor in the salads segment beginning in 2004. Burger King will offer a portfolio of standout, break-through salads to take advantage of market trends and consumer taste shifts, and significantly boost restaurant profitability”
 
Yikes.
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ed. note: credit to Bain for the high-brow hyphen in "break-through." And I don't know about y'all, but this is precious inside info - as soon as the market opens, I'm shorting Mickey D (NYSE: MCD) big-time.